'A Giant Middle Finger to the Entire System': Trans Anarchist Satanist Runs for Sheriff - Snopes.com

Voting in the 2020 U.S. Election may be over, but the misinformation keeps on ticking. Never stop fact-checking. Follow our post-election coverage here.

It's not the first time Aria DiMezzo has run to be sheriff of Cheshire County, New Hampshire. But it is the first time she's made national news for it.

DiMezzo isn't your typical candidate for sheriff. Her campaign motto is "F— the police." A transgender woman, she describes herself as a "shemale," a term considered offensive to many in the transgender community, but one which she considers more efficient for communication purposes (fewer words to say, she reasoned). She also describes herself as a libertarian anarchist and a satanist.

And to top it all off, after 4,000 voters cast ballots for her in the primary on Sept. 8, DiMezzo is running as a Republican, opposing Democratic incumbent Eli Rivera.

The story of the unexpected Republican candidate running for sheriff on a "F— the police" platform went national — then international — after it was picked up by Fox News.

As is often the case with viral stories, readers asked Snopes to verify the facts, and we confirmed with DiMezzo that her run for Cheshire County Sheriff is serious — and she is running to win.

We reached out to Rivera, her opponent, for comment but didn't get a response in time for publication. Holly Shulman, spokesperson for the New Hampshire Democratic Party, said in an email, "Sheriff Rivera is doing an outstanding job and we fully expect that the voters of Cheshire County will continue to support him."

We reached out to the New Hampshire Republican Party and the Republican party of Cheshire County for comment on DiMezzo's campaign and platform, but didn't get a response in time for publication.

DiMezzo said the fact that she ran unopposed in the primary election and will now be on the general election ticket as a Republican in November 2020 points to something else. She believes it reveals many people are likely blindly voting for Republicans or Democrats without knowing anything about the actual candidates.

She's faced backlash, which she attributes to the fact that she's the embodiment of an anti-Republican platform running as a Republican. But she faults voters for failing to find out anything about her before voting for her.

"I'm not an easy person to miss," DiMezzo said. "I'm 6 feet tall. I carry a pistol. I'm trans and I have bright red hair. How did all of those people not know who I am? How did all those people go into a voting booth and vote for someone who they knew nothing about? I was never secretive about who and what I am."

Indeed, DiMezzo's views are clearly displayed on her campaign website, where she shares several criticisms of law enforcement, political parties, and the federal government.

DiMezzo doesn't have any law enforcement experience. ("I have no experience whatsoever committing aggression against non-violent people," as she puts it.) Her current occupation is hosting a talk radio show called "Free Talk Live."

As one might expect, DiMezzo's views on how she would run the sheriff's department are unconventional. The New Hampshire Union Leader reported DiMezzo wouldn't enforce laws associated with what she describes as victimless crimes. She is "opposed to the war on drugs, and does not want to enforce any crimes she claims are victimless, which include drug crimes, sex work, immigration violations, and even speeding violations."

After her story went viral, vandals spray-painted a picture of a penis and a homophobic slur on her car. She didn't call the police to file a hate crime and vandalism report — doing so would have been useless, she said, and in her view, the role of the police is to "police the police."

DiMezzo told the Mindful Skeptics podcast that if she's elected sheriff, Cheshire County deputies would have three choices: hang out in the station, go home, or go out and monitor interactions between police and civilians. 

"If you see a cop pull someone over, pull over that cop, ask him why he's harassing peaceful people," she said on the podcast. "And if he continues doing it, place him under arrest."

In a phone interview with Snopes, DiMezzo compared the current job of policing to acting as "road pirates," meaning she views much of what they do as focused on citing the public so the government can collect fines.

DiMezzo also confirmed that she is a satanist — but by that she means she's an atheist. She doesn't believe in, much less worship, any deity.

"Anyone who believes that Lucifer or Satan actually exists, I'm not on board with," she said.

In that way she falls in line with the more prominent satanic organizations in the U.S., namely The Satanic Temple and the Church of Satan, which are atheistic. Their main focus is activism in favor of pluralism, in opposition of what they view as undue influence of Christianity in the U.S. political system and laws.

DiMezzo ran for Cheshire County sheriff as a libertarian in 2018, but this year the longtime Republican candidate Earl Nelson didn't run, offering her the chance to run unopposed as a major-party candidate.

Even if she doesn't win, DiMezzo said she hopes that her run can be a wake-up call that people need to do their research on the candidates they vote for and not simply vote based on party alignment. In 2018, running as a libertarian, DiMezzo only garnered 747 votes, less than a quarter of the votes she received this year. She said she believes the only reason she got so many more in 2020 was because she had an "R" next to her name.

Running on a major party ticket is a "giant middle finger to the entire system," she said. "I think that's what people like about it. They're fed up with the system."

DiMezzo said she gets a lot of messages of support, even from people who say they wouldn't vote for her but respect what she's doing.

"Even die-hard Christian conservatives say they don't agree with me, but they say this needed to be done," she said. "I get people saying they're going to pray for me, but I don't consider that hate. I just consider that confusion on their part."

Mail-in ballots in New Hampshire must be received by Nov. 3, 2020, at 5 p.m. Check Snopes' state-by-state vote-by-mail guide for more information.

Update 11/04/2020: As reported by the Keene Sentinel, Aria DiMezzo lost her bid for Cheshire County Sheriff.

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Expert Reveals 20 Words Women Know That Men Don't - 10 News First

No result found, try new keyword!Expert Reveals 20 Words Women Know That Men Don't  10 News First

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2021 Ghana Movie Awards nomination out - Myjoyonline

Nominations for the 2021 edition of the Ghana Movie Awards have officially been released and several movie stakeholders have all made it onto the list.

Movies like Borga, Sugar, Savannah, Coming To Africa, Cross, Shemale, The Therapist, Cold Road and Famous are all in contention for various awards. The above-mentioned movies are also battling in the Best Picture category.  

Actors Kwadwo Osei Tutu, Eugene Boateng, Anthony Woode, Anwar Jamison, and Quasi Blay Jnr are neck to neck in the Best Actor In the lead role category for their performances in the movies Uncharted Path, Borga, Savannah, Coming To Africa and Cross in that order.

The Best Actress in the lead role category is also keenly being contested by talented actresses Habiba Sinare, Dela Seade,  Jasmine Baroudi, Ashley Oluigbo, and  Nadia Buari.

There is fierce competition for the Discovery of the year award.

Nominees in that category include Ann Sophie Ave ( Fire And Ice), Eugene Boateng (Borga), Dennis Dwanena (Kidi) (Sugar), PY Addo Boateng (Coming To Africa), Ashley Oluigbo (Uncharted Path), Nana Yeboah (Shemale), Jude Arnold ( Borga),.Andy Tetteh (Hog Tie), Kwaku Brown ( Coming To Africa), and Sherifatu Issah (Savannah).

The Ghana Movie Awards is an annual award scheme that celebrates outstanding achievements in the Ghana movie industry since 2010. This year's event is expected to be spectacular and an improvement over previous events on December 30.

Below is the full nominations list:

VISUAL EFFECTS

1. Sugar – Lynx Entertainment Ghana

2. Cross – Michael Narh

3. Uncharted Path -Kwadwo Osei Tutu

4. Savannah – Afra Marley And Richard Ato Imbeah

5. Borga – Jude Arnold Kurankyi And Andreas Engelhardj

PRODUCTION DESIGN

1. Borga – Production Design By Anthony Tomety And

Set Decoration By Tanja Arlt

2. Uncharted Path – Production Design By Danie Baah And Set Decoration By Danial Baah

3. Savannah – Production Design By Godwin Mensah And Set Decoration By Godwin Mensah

4. Cross – Production Design By  School Brown Kukua Richard And Set Decoration By School Brown Kukua Richard

5. Coming To Africa – Production Design Salamatu Adamu And Decoration By Salamatu Adamu

MAKEUP AND HAIRSTYLING

1. Uncharted Path – Priscilla Hanson

2. Borga – Rita Essah 

3. Savannah – Forreal Joe Mensah

4. Sugar – Lynx Entertainment

5. Shemale – Seyen Beauty

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A LEADING ROLE

1. Kwadwo Osei Tutu- Uncharted Path

2. Eugene Boateng – Borga

3. Anthony Woode – Savannah

4. Anwar Jamison – Coming To Africa

5. Quasi Blay Jnr – Cross

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A LEADING ROLE

1. Habiba Sinare – Savannah

2. Dela Seade – Famous

3. Jasmine Baroudi – The Therapist

4. Ashley Oluigbo- Uncharted Path

5. Nadia Buari – Shemale

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTOR IN A SUPPORTING ROLE

1. Adjetey Annan – Borga

2. Khalil Khain – Coming To Africa

3. Jeffrey Nortey – The Therapist

4. Nana Yeboah, Ebenezer Forson- Shemale

5. Jude Arnold – Borga

BEST PERFORMANCE BY AN ACTRESS IN A SUPPORTING ROLE

1. Selassie Ibrahim – Famous

2. Kalsoume Sinare – Savannah

3. Roselyn Ngissah – Uncharted Path

4. Lydia Forson – Borga

5. Nana Ama Macbrown – Coming To Africa

 COSTUME AND WARDROBE

1. Savannah – Samira Yakubu And Fauzia Yakubu

2. Borga- Kayda Nana Afriyie Frimpong And Henrike Lur

3. Uncharted Path- Ashley Oluigbo

4. Cross – James Adofo

5. Coming To Africa-Augustina Twamasi

DIRECTING

1. Savannah- Kobi Rana

2. Coming To Africa- York Fabian

3. Uncharted Path- Kwadwo Osei Tutu And Gloria Ampofo

4. Borga- York- Fabian Paabe

5. The Therapeutic – Pascal Amanfo

EDITING

1. Famous- Richard Ato Imbeah

2. Borga- Bobby Good, Kaya Inan And Edd Maggs

3. Coming To Africa-Anwar Jamison

4. Uncharted Path- Kwadwo Osei Tutu

5. Savannah- Afra Marley And Richard Ato Imbeah

MUSIC (ORIGINAL SONG)

1. Sugar- Kidi

2. Borga- Sarkodie/Tomer Moked

3. Uncharted Path- Eugenio Minnini

4. Shemale – Berni Anti

5. Coming To Africa – Stonebwoy

MUSIC ( ORIGINAL SCORE)

1. Savannah- George Sedu

2. Uncharted Path-Eugenio Minnini

3. The Therapist- Berni Anti

4. Coming To Africa- Kirk Smith

5. Borga – Tomer Moked And Ben Lukas Boyson

 SOUND MIXING AND EDITING

1. Coming To Africa – Terry Poindexter And Cephas Asamamy

2. Unchartrd Path – Peter Avettey

3. Borga – Floyd Furstenau Robin Harfe And Paul Powaljew

4. The Therapist – Berni Anti

5. Cross – James Adofo

WRITING ADAPTED OR ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY

1. Savannah – Jemila Suleman

2. Borga – Toks Korner And Fabian Raabe

3. Uncharted Path – Ashley Oluigbo

4. The Therapist – Pascal Amanfo

5. Cross – Kwaku Dua Prempeh

CINEMATOGRAPHY

1. The Therapist- Isaac Kwame Awuah

2. Uncharted Path – Decosta Agyemang Dua

3. Borga – Tobias Von Dem Borne

4. Savannah – Leonard Atawugah Kudaloe  ( Obl)

5. Coming To Africa – Ellis Fowler

BEST PICTURE

Borga – Danny Damah And Tony Tagoe

2. Sugar – Dennis Dwanena And Richard Mensah

3. Savannah- Salam Mumuni And Tony Lachman

4. Coming To Africa – Py Addo Boateng

5. Cross – Samuel Owusu Asare

6. Shemale – Samuel Degraft Yeboah

7. The Therapist – Abdul Mumuni

8. Cold Road – Francis Agbetsoamedo

9. Famous- Abdul Mumuni Salam

DISCOVERY

Ann Sophie Ave – Fire And Ice

2. Eugene Boateng – Borga

3. Dennis Dwanena (Kidi) – Sugar

4. Py Addo Boateng – Coming To Africa

5. Ashley Oluigbo – Uncharted Path

6. Nana Yeboah – Shemale

7. Jude Arnold – Borga

8. Andy Tetteh – Hog Tie

9. Kwaku Brown – Coming To Africa 

10. Sherifatu Issah – Savannah

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Trailblazing trans woman becomes first to get Ugandan ID card with correct gender - PinkNews

Cleopatra Kambugu, a trailblazing trans activist and writer, makes history as the first transgender person in Uganda to have their new gender recognised by the government. (Instagram/@xulaye)

The first known Ugandan trans woman to receive a national ID card with an 'F' marker wants to "shed the sad African trans narrative".

Cleopatra Kambugu always knew she was different. Growing up in Kampala, Uganda, in a family of 15, she describes her early life as challenging.

"People always called me 'boy-girl' or 'shemale'," she tells PinkNews. Her transness was always clear to her and to those around her, but she was held back by a lack of knowledge and terminology.

"Growing up in an era when trans people were being policed, paraded on Jerry Springer and limited to the sex worker narrative was tough," she said. "So I turned to education to gain an understanding of who I am."

But as is all too common, her school failed to cover gender or sexuality beyond heterosexuality. Nonetheless, the experience ignited a flame within Kambugu.

Now 35, Cleo Kambugu is a leading trans activist working towards social justice and equality for trans, intersex and non-binary people, as well as sex workers. In 2016, she became the subject of a film titled The Pearl of Africa, "a story of love, hate and being transgender".

When the Ugandan government passed its Anti-Homosexuality Act in 2013, prohibiting same-sex sexual relations, Kambugu was outed by a tabloid newspaper. She fled to neighbouring Kenya for safety.

Following her move, she joined an activist-led foundation called Uhai Eashri that provides funding for sexual and gender minorities based in East Africa. Within the first year of her joining, Kambugu facilitated the success of a grant transfer of $200,000 to an Ugandan movement in support of bringing down the Anti-Homosexuality Act. It was annulled three months later.

"This ushered a new era of donors believing that education and litigation advocacy can change things," she beamed.

"The trans community in Uganda have done a lot of work to shift social norms around sexuality and gender. So, while some folks might not like trans people, they at least know who they are."

Kambugu recalls being 20-something when she first met another trans person on a night out. "Just seeing someone who looked like me reassured me," she said.

Through the work she was doing at Uhai Eashri, Kambugu set her sights on creating a documentary that followed her journey to medically transitioning. She began reaching out to people, but with little success she turned to YouTube to post videos from her dorm room, always signing off with: "Feel free to get in contact if you want to make this a film."

After several Skype calls with the Swedish director Johnny von Wallstroem, Kambugu made The Pearl of Africa, showcasing intimate moments with her then-partner, a cis man. The film attracted global coverage from CNN, AOL and many more.

Off the back of the film's success, Kambugu became a global trans activist travelling to and from Africa – so much so that her passport ran out and she had to move back to Kampala to renew it, in 2017.

"I was flustered at the thought," she said. "I wanted to avoid excessive questioning so declared my identity beforehand."

She sought pro-bono advice from a community lawyer with the Human Rights Advocates Program, who enlightened her about the Registration of Persons Act. The law means that, to change a gender marker on identification documents, a person must have signed permission from both parents and the Ministry of Gender, Labour and Social Development.

"From that, I went in and requested that my case be handled by the highest person at the Ministry of Internal Affairs that dealt with passports and advice, which I secured," she said.

To her surprise, there were no complications. The minister mentioned needing some time to consult with a legal tribunal to ensure he could not be reprimanded for what he was about to do. After a few days, Kambugu was called in and handed a new passport with the gender marker 'F'.

Securing her passport in 2018 was just the beginning, especially since in Uganda, more value is placed on the national ID card. Without one, citizens are unable to interact with the government, vote, access health care or own any property.

"It comes with another set of barriers," she said, "your local council has to approve of who you are post-transition and your parents too – despite your age."

Luckily, Kambugu spent seven years working with her family as she transitioned, so they agreed to sign for her ID.

On 27 September, Kambugu logged into Instagram to announce through a heartfelt post, that after a year-long wait (due to COVID) she had become the first trans woman to obtain an Ugandan national ID card in her correct gender.

"I don't think in giving me this ID they were making a statement. Just this year, [the government] were just discussing the sexual offence bill to re-criminalise homosexuality," she said.

Many African cultures believe that a name can path out your child's future, so when she discovered that Cleopatra meant "father's glory", it felt like a beautiful way to honour her close paternal relation. Likewise, her last name, Kambugu, her grandfather's name, means a perennial weed that is difficult to eradicate because of its resilience and stubbornness.

"I want to spend the next 35 years of my life shedding the sad African trans narrative. We don't just carry tragic stories," she said, "I am a molecular biologist, geneticist, activist, imaginative, daring, different, audacious and an Aries."

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Transgender Women Explain What It's Like When They Don't 'Look Trans' - VICE

When I was 10 years old, I was a boy that looked like a girl. I had thick chestnut hair down to where my boobs should've budded and a dainty voice as yet untouched by testosterone.

My 90-something neighbor used to congratulate my mother on what a beautiful young lady I was becoming. "Oh, Clementine, this is my son!" my mom always quickly corrected. I didn't know whether I was more embarrassed that I passed as a girl, or that I was embarrassed that I liked passing as a girl.

Thirteen years later, my boobs have budded—courtesy of modern medicine—but my voice has also dropped like a brick. I can now pass, at least, if I'm quiet. When I ride the A train in the morning as all the Wall Street stallions pile in, coyly biting off my split ends and minding my own business, I'm cis…until a source or editor calls me, and I frantically pick up before the train leaves the platform: "Hi, hello—I'll call you back in five." My voice's deep vibrations hang in the air. Eyes turn to me, guys' eyebrows raise, and girls breathe a sigh of relief that at least the prettiest girl in this car is a tranny.

Passing is a refusal of the nonconsensual boyhood I lived for 19 years—kind of like how, as a baby vegetarian, I ate hamburgers at family barbecues for lack of a better option at the time. Many trans people feel passing is about being perceived by others as their authentic selves. Other trans people can't pass, have no interest in passing, or both: Xris, a 21-year-old Latinx trans woman in New York's Westchester County, will "never be able to pass [as a cis woman] in my current body," she said. "I'm a bearded woman." Politically, Xris said, she finds passing to be "an act of assimilation." For her, passing is not about being seen for who one actually is—a woman—but rather being seen as something one is not—cisgender.

In addition to affirming identity, gender passing, when it's physically available to trans women, can be a way for them to access resources they might otherwise not be able to. Its function as a survival practice was first articulated by Black writers of the Harlem Renaissance, like Nella Larsen, to describe the experience of light-skinned Black Americans passing as white, both intentionally and unintentionally, during and after the period of chattel slavery in order to access wealth, privilege, and safety that a racist society would not afford them. They transgressed the idea of racial identity as fixed.

Black and trans experiences cannot be equated, but perceptions of transness, should a person not pass as cis, can result in both discrimination and bias, especially for Black trans women. One in six trans people reported they'd lost a job, and 88 percent were denied "equal treatment and services," by businesses or government agencies because of their "gender identity and expression," according to the largest national transgender survey, conducted in 2015.

"People privilege the rights of others based off of how they look," said Gillian Branstetter, media relations manager for the National Center for Transgender Equality and a trans woman herself. A study surveying nearly 4,000 Americans found that "a transgender person's level of gender conformity in appearance, but not their self-identified gender or age, affects how other people perceive of their sex," and in turn, their "attitudes toward transgender rights."

Passing can mean the difference between having access to resources, rights, and respect—or not. Working at a national advocacy organization, Branstetter has seen firsthand how this can play out. "One of our staff members was in a meeting with a sitting member of Congress," she said. "They told the staff member that 'they're not worried about you, because you look like a woman.'"

Some trans women are equipped with a greater sense of agency when they pass. "There's a part of myself that gets off [on] when I'm in a conference meeting or a seminar and say, 'I went to an all-boys high school,' and cis guys go, 'Whoa, what!'" said Lavelle Ridley, a Black trans woman from Toledo, Ohio. "There's something really powerful, even attractive, about controlling your narrative, or reveal[ing] that part of yourself. The power to decide when you know this thing about me—it feels good."

The transphobic term for passing within the context of sexual attraction, "trapping," is used to accuse trans women of being deceitful and predatory for not disclosing their identities to straight men. Trans women are often portrayed as traps in "shemale" porn (a slur). For John Phillips, academic and author of the book Transgender on Screen, the unique type of pleasure generated by the shemale genre comes from the "tension of concealing and revealing," specifically of her penis.

What some guys see as hot about trans women can also be their grounds for violence. Some men realize they're attracted to someone who looks like a girl, but challenges their notions of what a girl is, so they panic. "Trans panic," in fact, was the defense mounted in the 2002 murder case of Gwen Arujo, a 17-year-old Latina trans girl from California. She had been sexually involved with four men at a party who forced her to undress. When they learned she had a penis, they tortured and murdered her.

To reduce the conviction from murder to manslaughter, the defense argued that the "crime [was] one committed in the 'heat of the moment.'" Like the "gay panic" defense innovated in 1960s courtrooms and most famously used in the Matthew Shepard murder trial, trans panic holds that discovering "withheld" information about the victim's "true sex" reasonably "prompts the ostensible 'panic' that leads to violence."

"My safety is in being visibly trans," said DJ Jasmine Infiniti, a Black trans woman in New York City. "I was always upfront, even if they approached me in the street: 'You know I'm trans, right?' [Still,] there were several instances where men would be like, 'You were trying to trick me' [and] getting violent." In 2017, Infiniti was walking in Brooklyn with some of The Girls, including fellow DJ London Jade, when they were harassed. "The guys were like, 'Ooh, hey, ma!'" Infiniti said. "A woman that was [with them] was like, 'Those are transformers,'" by which she meant transgender people. "The men felt emasculated because they sexually harassed what they [no longer] thought was a woman. They broke my jaw."

I've experienced the dangers of passing, too. One Baltimore summer day, I was trudging alone on a busy thoroughfare. Two guys in a car slowed down, creeping alongside the curb and jeering profanities. Suddenly: "Oh, shit, that's a dude!" The driver started cackling at the friend who had leaned his head out the window—and who was now enjoying an unexpected reversal in vulnerability. The spotlight was no longer on me, but on the man, whose face ripened into an ashamed blush. To course-correct, he spat, "Fucking faggot," then, "Die, tranny." Ducking into the nearest storefront, I bawled—but I was safe.

Infiniti and I both faced street harassment by men who felt "trapped," but the disparate outcomes illustrate how violence is not distributed equally. Another Brooklyn trans woman, Islan Nettles, was murdered by a man who was ridiculed by his friends for flirting with her, a girl he had not clocked as trans. Unlike me, she was Black. Being clocked as both Black and trans can be fatal.

"When I'm around other Black people, that's when I feel most watched," said Lavelle. Her fear doesn't stem from the misguided, racist notion that Black men are more transphobic than their white peers—it's that her transness is more noticeable than her Blackness, since the latter is a shared experience. "In mostly white spaces, I don't stress about passing. I'm already othered. Already, I stress out about difference. Whatever gender difference they may perceive is already folded into how they see my racial difference," she said.

Infiniti agreed. "In those instances, I don't even need to pass. [Non-Black people are] already exoticizing me."

Vera Blossom, a Filipinx trans and nonbinary woman from Las Vegas, passes as a cis woman. The treatment she experienced before and after transition makes clear for her how racial and gender passing are intertwined. Blossom said she was previously "perceived as an Asian man, which was one of the least desirable categories of men. She wore "four-inch platforms, overall booty shorts, and purple hair, and no one would point," she said. "I was trying to be seen. No matter what I did, no one would look at me."

Blossom's experience fits with the racist trope of East and Southeast Asian men as undesirable or feminine. After her transition, her Asianness also mediates how she passes: "The attention is coming, whether I want it or not. No one has a lukewarm opinion of me anymore," she said. "Going from an Asian man to an Asian woman: It's [going from] the ethnicity [and gender] that everyone looks over [to] the one that [people] fawn over."

I have a Japanese-American father. In high school, when I cut my long hair and leaned into being a boy (albeit a total flamer), I was still interpreted as East Asian, often to racist results. Once, I was in my high school's library studying with a friend, and I looked over to see she'd drawn a portrait of me. Kim Jong-Sam, it was titled—a mix of the North Korean leader's name and my dead name. In the picture, my eyes were squinted and my face was rounded.

I laughed at the time, but racist experiences like that shaped my attachment to an identity that many did not, and do not, readily see. Maybe the hyper-feminization of Asian men aided me in transition, but as I became a woman, visual signifiers of my Japaneseness vanished from my body. When I changed my name to Sessi, I also changed my middle name to Kuwabara, my obāchan's—grandmother's—family name. I wanted to disrupt my ability to pass as white. Becoming a woman was entwined with maintaining my Japaneseness.

However subtle it may be, I've been able to choose how others interpret my race and ethnicity. But I've had no choice in how others see me as a woman. By definition, in order to be a woman, I had to be trans. In contrast, cis women, by virtue of existing, get to be seen as women. Their being is distinguished from their becoming. For trans women, the latter displaces the former. When people see me as or know me to be trans, my appearance feels footnoted by disclaimers. That's why passing feels so good to me: my curvy hips, thickened thighs, and softened skin belong to me, and not others' questions. I get to be a body, and not an explanation.

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'RuPaul's Drag Race' to drop controversial segment - Entertainment Weekly

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'RuPaul's Drag Race' to drop controversial segment

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The Future Belongs to Ts Madison - Advocate.com

No one's ever had a career quite like Ts Madison. After working in the adult film industry — starring in films and running a lucrative production company — she's since transitioned into Hollywood, appearing most recently in a scene-stealing role in the movie, Zola, and in The Ts Madison Experience, a reality series she executive produced on WE tv. Madison's also currently shooting Bros with Billy Eichner and will appear in The Perfect Find, a new romantic comedy starring Gabrielle Union and Niecy Nash. 

Madison credits this new phase of her career to three things: going viral on Vine ("New weave! 22 inches!"), the tenacity she has displayed throughout her entire life, and RuPaul. 

"If it wasn't for RuPaul," she says on this week's LGBTQ&A podcast. "RuPaul was like, "I want her on my show. I want her in this space. I don't care whatever pushback that you think that you're going to give me. This is my show and I want her here." He helped her, mentored her, didn't try to force her to hide her past or into a mold that didn't fit. He didn't see her as a "detriment", a word Madison often heard when the public was first discovering her videos on Vine.

This was right around the time that Laverne Cox was appearing on the cover of Time, when trans people in the media were few and far between. "I love Laverne...But it was a very difficult time to go through when she was on Time magazine as 'The Transgender Tipping Point' and then I'm over here and it was just, 'This is right. This is wrong.' When in all actuality, none of it was wrong." 

But RuPaul didn't see her that way. He and a few others extended Madison a hand. World of Wonder, the production company behind RuPaul's Drag Race, created a hit web series around her. Slowly and surely, displaying the same hustle and grit that she applied to her adult film career, Ts Madison has created a new lane for herself in the entertainment industry.

"I've never come in through the front door. Never," she says. "It's never been through the front door and my existence right now in this world — because there's somebody else behind me somewhere — my existence will be used as an example and then they'll be able to come in through the front door."

On this week's episode of LGBTQ&A, Ts Madison opens up about her unlikely career trajectory, why she owes so much to RuPaul, and the pushback she continues to receive in Hollywood.

You can read an excerpt below and listen to the full interview on Apple Podcasts. 

JM: You really shot up and rose to mainstream attention on Vine, which has since shut down. The initial response to you on Vine was not positive, right?TM: Oh, it was not. At that time, I was maybe in my eighth, ninth, 10th year, of creating adult films online. So I was always looking for an outlet to promote my material and I stumbled across Vine. I followed a couple of hashtags and the hashtag was #VineAfterDark. I clicked on it and I was like, "Ohh. Nudity."

Here's the thing, Jeffrey. There were a lot of Vine creators who were Vine famous for making funny videos. They had After Dark videos too, but they were cis people, cis-het people. So, I'm like, "Let me invade the space." Before I even posted my very first Vine, I studied all of the After Dark stuff. There was no trans content there, so I was like, "OK. Well, maybe this would be another outlet for me to promote what I'm selling." So I put my first video up there and I did it in a funny way. "New weave! New weave! 22 inches! Yes!"

It was an accident and it was only a space of me trying to promote a product. A straight guy, he stumbled across it — God, what was that little boy's name? He started making videos about me. And then the sales of my site started to expand because people were like, "How does this fat woman have a penis?" They weren't even in the space of thinking I was trans. They thought that I was a fat woman with a penis.

JM: This was around 2013?TM: Yeah. 2013. Yes. 2013.

JM: That's the same year that Orange Is the New Black came out, when a lot of people go to know of Laverne Cox and transness at a big level. People watching you on vine probably didn't have language to even see you and label you as a trans woman.TM: They didn't. There wasn't any language and because people associate trans women with so much masculinity and masculine features…to those people that were looking at this, they saw a woman, but then the genitalia, they saw a penis. It was very much so like, "How could this even happen?"

So, here's when the conversation started to really go insane. And here's the thing, people really felt that it was a detriment to our community. I love Laverne. I have extreme respect for Laverne. But it's one thing to hear trans, but another to see it. And even though it seemed as though I was a detriment at the time in our community, people had the opportunity to see it.

JM: Is "detriment" how people were describing you?TM: Yes, because in the backlash that I started receiving from the community was like, "Oh, she's a detriment to our community. She's not a representation of our community."

And I'm a clap-back girl. I will tear your ass up. I was making my own money. I've always been very successful in making my own money and I make my own rules, so I don't care. I wasn't even thinking about a community. I was thinking about keeping my lights on in my home.

JM: Even though you were getting mocked on Vine, you also didn't let that stop you. You kept posting videos on there.TM: Because my goal was to make my sales and it was working for me. People were buying. They were going to my site looking like, "Oh my God." And it was not just local conversation. It was a worldwide conversation about me.

JM: What percentage of sales increased? 50%?TM: Oh honey, listen. It was such a huge increase in sales. Child, I made so much money during that time. It was ridiculous. Yeah, I would say about 50% or 60% increase. I made good money, but an influx of an additional like $5,000 or $6,000 or $7,000 a week. A week.

At that time, I didn't feel that I had a responsibility to my community. I remember me saying, "I've never seen the community show up and pay a bill. I've never seen the community show up and feed and house me when I needed somewhere to live. I've never seen the community show up and take care of me when I needed to go to the doctor. Don't show up now talking to me about what's best for the community when I'm a part of a community that I was out here trying to survive. The community didn't give me a job. Fuck y'all."

At that time, that's the way that I felt.

People didn't understand. And I want to make sure that I say this, I love Laverne. I got to know Laverne. I communicate with Laverne. But it was a very difficult time to go through when she was on Time magazine as "The Transgender Tipping Point" and then I'm over here and it was just, "This is right. This is wrong." When in all actuality, none of it was wrong.

JM: At that time, you were not just performing in adult films, you were running a production company, monetizing a website. You had turned it into a full business. It's similar to what folks are doing today on OnlyFans, but before those platforms existed.TM: Before they existed. You know what's funny to me? Some of the same bitches that were talking cash shit about me back then…when times fell hard, when the pandemic came through, I had never seen them naked, but guess what? They're flourishing now. And I'm like, "Oh honey, I've been there, did that, got a t-shirt, made a meal, and keep going. Y'all just now getting into something that I've already conquered, honey. All of you are my daughters."

JM: When did you take your sex work business online?TM: Oh, that happened back in 2004.

JM: That feels really early.TM: When the internet was fresh and new, fresh and new. It was already being dominated by white girls and Asian girls and stuff like that and there had been a few Black girls or whatever that were on there. However, they had a machine behind them.

When I came into the business, I didn't have a machine. My best friend who's in heaven now — praise God that she's in heaven, my heavenly warrior — she introduced me to it. I was like, "How are you at home not going to work and you have this beautiful house and trinkets of deceit? Honey, all of these Faberge and Franklin Mint and Baccarat crystals. You have all of these things in here and you don't go to work?" She says, "Honey, you got to work smarter and not harder."

She introduced me to that because I didn't know anything about making residuals off of being naked. She became my gay mother, my porn mother. And once you introduced me to something, it's mine from then on out. You how Whitney Houston covered "I Will Always Love You" and it became hers? She introduced me to the adult film game and then I found a niche area, dominated that, and it became mine. I didn't erase her, but I went to different heights.

I was hell-bent on me not being broke anymore in life. Me not having to worry about where I'm going to live, how I'm going to pay my bills because I came from that time of me having to really worry. And this was a place of security for me.

JM: Money aside, there are safety concerns to doing sex work in person. You didn't have to worry about that online.TM: Yes. I was online, I was safe. I was able to buy a home. I bought a house. That was the first thing I did when I made enough money. I careered it and not just a career, but it was a security. Do you know how it is for trans people to go through the world without any security? For people to judge you and to rake you over the coals…I'm like, have you guys forgotten how hard it is out here to be two spirits combined into one? Have you not forgotten that there are people who will not hire you because of what you are? Have you forgotten how difficult it is for you to occupy cis places as a trans person? So why are you breathing fire down on me for trying to secure security for myself?

Even now, when I think about it in this space that I'm occupying now…because child, I haven't taken my clothes off in years. And I get to say, "Why did you judge me? Why were you attacking me? Why when you as a queer person or a trans person understands how difficult it is to occupy cis spaces and this was my form of creating a secure space for me? Money-wise, living-wise, health-wise, safety-wise, I was securing a place for me, but you were so concerned about how we are perceived in cis spaces and overlook that this girl is really trying to secure her security. But you worried about how straight people perceive you? Please."

I felt wronged. I felt wronged because this really wasn't a choice. A lot of things happened to me by force. I was forced into having to do that and a lot of girls are forced into that. Even the girls who are occupying high-level spaces now will tell you...they may not elaborate on it but they'll tell you, "Yeah. There was a time that I was involved in a little sex work and I can't deny that." No, you can't because it's just true. It's true.

JM: With the t-word, tranny. Is it more or less required to attach that word to yourself if you're working in porn as a trans woman?TM: Right. Now, I'm not in the adult film industry anymore so I don't use it and I understand that there are girls who don't want to be called that... I get it. I respect it. But when people try to use that as a slur to me, it's never been a slur to me. Tranny had been a part of the way I monetized. I made money from that: tranny, shemale, all of these were hashtags that were used when you wanted to look up a T-girl that's in the business.

However, I did understand that lots of girls are not in the business and so it could potentially be offensive. That's a word that people have used as a slur and also men have used to objectify trans women. So I was like, "Alright, cool." I'm not going to say I went with the flow, but I understood it. I also let people in the world know there's many words that you can use to offend me. That's not one of them.

JM: Because that is the word that bought you a house.TM: Boom. Boom. Yes.

JM: I also think it's secretly subversive that you still have Ts as part of your name. Do people outside of the community realize that it means trans?  TM: No. And the reason why I will not get rid of it, it's because I took ownership of it with all that I do. I want people to understand, I am not cis nor do I want to be a cis woman. There are lots of people who like to use that, "You'll never be a real woman." Sweetie, I want you to understand this is why the Ts has never dropped. I am confident and secure in my transness, darling. I've taken ownership of those things and I live a very, very, very, very comfortable life. You don't live like me, honey. You don't. And I am Ts. I walk in the door letting you know, I am Ts Madison, honey.

JM: You didn't just work in adult films, you were notorious. I think the assumption would be that someone like you would not be welcomed into Hollywood. To the question of how did Ts do it and crossover, it sounds like a key component was going viral on Vine.

TM: Yes. The virality that Vine gave me and the tenacity that I had to continue to be my authentic self. I haven't changed who I am. I just kept my clothes on. I am still loud, live, and in color. I still will cuss your motherfucking ass out if necessary and I still stand up for sex positivity for girls that are working girls. I demand that when you see the girls trying to take care of themselves, you respect it for what it is.

I think that a lot of people who are doing sex work now, it's in a different phase. It's in a phase of... Oh God, y'all, don't cuss me out when y'all hear this. It's in an easy phase now. It's easy now. "Oh, I can go into that and make money." As opposed to 20-years ago, when it was like, "Girl, we're not giving you fags a job." Or "We're not letting you trannies come in here." Or "You transvestites, we don't want you working in here confusing our customers." I remember going to work and they called me in the HR officer and told me to stop wearing fitting dresses because I was confusing the men.

I'm like, "I don't got nothing to do with those men being confused, bitch. I came here to come to work. I don't have anything... I sit behind a cubicle. I walk from my car to the doors to the clock-in machine, to the cubicle. If I'm causing a disturbance because I have a big ass and y'all went out there and told those people that I'm a man... Y'all didn't have to tell those people that. You didn't have to even say anything about that. Yes, I have breasts and I have hips and I have body, but girl, you told them that I was a man. So that you've done these things and then you want to terminate me because now I'm the problem."

JM: You're describing multiple experiences, not just a one-time thing. This was recurring.TM: Multiple experiences, yes. I'm a 44-year-old trans person, honey and I've been trans for 25 years, girl. Living in it for 25 years and you could not imagine 25 years ago, the way things were in the workplace. There are still difficulties now but it was real, real messy then.

JM: I also want to make sure we're not only painting a rosy picture of your experiences in Hollywood and these mainstream spaces now. I assume there have been challenges.TM: If it wasn't for RuPaul...I have to say this. If it was not for RuPaul pressing. Because RuPaul was like, "I want her on my show. I want her in this space. I don't care whatever pushback that you think that you're going to give me. This is my show and I want her here." And see, this is the responsibility of other queer people and queens that occupy spaces, it is important when you occupy positions of power that you reach into your community and you give opportunities to the girls who haven't been given those opportunities because sometimes you're missing out on a gem.

Yes, I have received pushback. I've never come in through the front door. Never. It's always been either a side door, either somebody let me in on the side, either somebody crack the window, which is God. I've always had to find the back entrance. It's never been through the front door and my existence right now in this world — because there's somebody else behind me somewhere — my existence will be used as an example and then they'll be able to come in through the front door.

Listen to the full podcast interview on Apple Podcasts or Spotify.

LGBTQ&A is The Advocate's weekly interview podcast hosted by Jeffrey Masters. Past guests include Pete Buttigieg, Laverne Cox, Miss Major Griffin-Gracy, Billie Jean King, and Roxane Gay. New episodes come out every Tuesday.

https://shemalequeen.wordpress.com/

Best Transgender Dating Sites In 2021 - The Island Now

Although there are plenty of apps and dating sites out there, finding someone is not as simple as it might seem. Dating apps can be particularly problematic if you are hoping to meet a special someone or find a long-term relationship. Furthermore, trans folks have even more problems since our genders can differ from what society expects.

Individuals who identify as transgender have fewer options available both in the real world and on the Internet. It can be challenging to discover other people who share your interests. That's why we have created this list of the ten best dating apps and dating sites for trans women and crossdressers who want to date close to home.

Unfortunately, for the transgender community, dating platforms tend to have a section created just for transgender users. Still, there are frequently negative experiences from members of the general dating app user base and abuses that members of the transgender community perpetrate.

It is a fact that trans men and women are fetishized frequently on dating websites and viewed as sex objects, all of which elevates the suffering of these people.

To what do trans people go when they aren't in relationships?

Top 10 Best Transgender Dating Sites & Apps Of 2021:

Many platforms promise to provide many features, but they frequently fall short. Rather than investing your time, money, and nerves, simply look at our suggestions to find out which ones work best for you. So then, let us begin.

TSDates.com – Best Overall Trans Dating Site

Butterfly – Best Site for Trans People Looking for Love

Adult Friend Finder – Best Trans Only Section 

LadyBoyKisses.com – Best Inclusive Dating Website 

TSTVPersonals.com – Best Trans Singles User Base 

MyTransexualDate.com – Best Personals Style Trans Dating

Tinder – Best Mainstream Dating Site 

DateACrossdresser.com – Best Dating Site for Crossdressers

Taimi.com – Tons of User Profiles

OkCupid – Best Dating Experience 

#1. TSDates.com – Best Overall Trans Dating Site Overview

TS Dates is a completely free dating site that also includes a Gold Membership that offers additional features to the site's members. The website's primary aim is to help crossdressers and transgender people meet and date with other people like them. Currently, there are over 70 million members in over 100 countries.

TS Dates is very good at helping you meet like-minded individuals, which is why it has so many fans. Many people use text messages or instant messaging when they want to communicate. There are over 40 million people with photos and videos on their profiles, among whom there are over 40 million users.

To proceed quickly, you may want to avoid using unnecessary words or repeating information. It has a great search engine with an impressive number of filters and customization. To meet potential matches in the real world, this tool scours the globe for users within a certain radius of your location.

Pros

established in 1996, 

TV, TG, TS, people who identify as the third gender 

lots of different people using it

Let us see multiple photos

Cons

Free accounts only get limited messaging.

The paid account is quite expensive compared to other sites.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of TS Dates

#2. Butterfly – Best Site for Trans People Looking for Love Overview

Butterfly is, without a doubt, the best transgender dating app for men and women, non-binary individuals, and others. Overall, trans users account for 34% of the user population, while cis users account for 43% and cis women account for 23% of the user base. Despite the fact that the majority of the user base is heterosexual, additional safeguards have been implemented to protect transgender persons online.

The Butterfly app, for example, has a feature that mutes phrases like "shemale" and "tranny" automatically. It will alert the sender that these keywords are offensive if they try to transmit them to you. Furthermore, you will not be able to upload NSFW photographs on your profile, ensuring that sexual innuendo is not continuously rammed down your throat.

While bugs are unavoidable, customer feedback has resulted in constant improvements. The term "butterfly" can refer to a variety of things. I use a butterfly metaphor to express it, and the word refers to feeling alienated, objectified, and patronized by people in your daily life.

Pros

Excellent protection from hate speech or offensive terms

Large user base looking for long term love

Cons

A large number of Cis users

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Butterfly

#3. Adult Friend Finder – Best Trans Only Section Overview

Adult Friend Finder (or AFF) is a bit of an odd one when it comes to dating sites. On the one hand, it's geared toward sexual partners and swingers, but on the other, it also results in long-term relationships. For several years, this well-established online dating service has provided a welcoming place for trans individuals. Today, it continues to do so.

We're excited to see it!

You'll be able to upload videos and take part in real-time video chats, which is a highly unique feature because you'll be the only person on the entire Internet with this capability. It is an excellent way to flirt, and in that manner, ensure that you are talking to an actual person. However, it is evident that for AFF to be thoroughly enjoyed, it is necessary to invest in a premium membership. These are not cheap, unfortunately.

Pros

Very well established site

It is also chosen as one of the best hookup sites of 2021 by The Island Now

Great for swingers and open relationships

Cons

Premium memberships are quite expensive.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Adult Friend Finder

#4. LadyBoyKisses.com – Best Inclusive Dating Website Overview

LadyBoyKisses is a dating website for ladyboys, women, and men who want to meet other singles and find someone who would be suitable to date.

People are not required to identify their gender or their country of origin on the site before they are allowed to join. You don't have to meet specific requirements to be a member of the site, but it is monopolized by ladyboys looking for a relationship or fun.

The guide claims to have successfully arranged successful meetings of ladyboys and ladyboy admirers around the world.

This online dating site appears to be an average dating platform; however, we are not sure whether it's worthwhile checking it out or if it's just like every other online dating service that preys on people's wallets. 

Pros

Perfect for ladyboys or ladyboy admirers

Has international presence

Cons

Specialty website so not perfect for everyone

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of LadyBoyKisses.com

#5. TSTVPersonals.com – Best Trans Singles User Base Overview

The TS TV Personals website has been in operation since 1996, making it one of the oldest transgender dating sites on the Internet. Even though it may not be the most glamorous or up-to-date dating platform on this list, it has retained its legacy thanks to its status as a pioneer. This site is designed primarily for connecting cis men with transgender women. If you fall into one of these categories, it's a great website to use.

However, it costs a lot of money to become a premium member.

Non-members are only allowed to have one photo in their profile and only write a short user profile and send a maximum of three messages to each member. On the other hand, you'll have to pay $20 monthly for their 12-month gold premium membership if you want to take things to the next level. Unfortunately, you might not find love on this classic transgender dating site, but it does have plenty of users (primarily in the 30+ age bracket).

Pros

It has been around a while so that the platform can be trusted

Large Trans user base

Cons

Premium membership is pricey.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of TSTV Personals

#6. MyTransexualDate.com – Best Personals Style Trans Dating Overview

Many people feel strongly that there aren't many quality transsexual dating sites out there, which makes me concerned about finding a suitable transgender date. It is essential to understand that men searching for trans women as dates, such as a cute ladyboy, will have plenty of available choices.

This online dating service has proven to successfully connect men who want to date a trans woman with interested transgender people searching for dating partners worldwide. One search result can then be combined with results from a sister site focused on ladyboys, giving you even more options.

Pros

It offers a quilty choice of trans singles

International services

Cons

A paid membership is expensive but offers great features.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of MyTransexualDate

#7. Tinder – Best Mainstream Dating Site Overview

Tinder is a top-rated dating app, which everyone is familiar. Essentially, it's like using Facebook in the world of dating. Tinder was not built for trans people, and previous versions of the dating app didn't allow users to select different genders. However, in 2016, Tinder also introduced new identities such as genderqueer, transman, or woman, as well as crossdresser, and other varieties of these terms.

Tinder has taken many measures to include the trans community, and that makes a big difference. Although it is a fantastic location for transgender individuals, it is also an excellent place for crossdressers. You can customize the app to make it identical to you. People who have the same sexual preferences are gathered for you.

Although there are many people on the app, there is a constant stream of LGBTQ+ users. It is possible to meet both casual encounters and people interested in forming committed relationships.

Pros

One of the most widely used dating apps

Huge user base

Cons

Tinder is getting better but doesn't specialize in trans dating.

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Tinder

#8. DateACrossdresser.com – Best Dating Site for Crossdressers Overview

The Date A Crossdresser dating website is the only one on the market for men who prefer to dress in women's clothing of all genders and sexual orientations. This website is excellent for CD, TS, and TV people, and you can depend on this platform to identify dating candidates searching for the same preferences.

It is a relatively unique place where people of all genders can express their desires and experimentation. Transexuals and transvestites alike are welcome to use it. Free membership doesn't put any limitations on what you can do. It gives you a good amount of features and the ability to send email messages.

If you are searching for something specific, there are numerous fetishes on the site. And, you can choose to search or receive members by interest area.

Pros

Many trans attracted men

Decent user base

Great for a variety of sexual preferences

Cons

The website hasn't established a lot of credibility. 

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of DateACrossdresser

#9. Taimi.com – Tons of User Profiles Overview

Taimi is an LGBTQI+ dating and social networking app/platform that incorporates a free and paid plan in accordance with the customer's spending capacity. It has around 250,000 users from the US, with an average of 50,000 active members each week. Most of the members are young people between the ages of eighteen and twenty-four.

If you'd like to make a profile, the app is entirely free, and it only takes you five simple steps to get started. To help people meet new people, it matches them based on their interests and location. If you get connected with someone, you can message them even if you're using the free version.

However, there are only a few fake profiles on the app, and members can enter much more detailed information into their profiles, such as uploading photos and listing personal details. It is distinguished by its own unique characteristics, such as Live Duet, Chat Requests, and Rollbacks.

Pros

Designed to connect for long term relationships

Many sexuality options

Cons

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of Taimi

#10. OkCupid – Best Dating Experience Overview

The OkCupid dating site is traditionally one of the larger platforms for heterosexual interactions. However, in the previous two years, it shifted pretty significantly. The entire incident was caused in 2011 when the website introduced the option to hide heterosexual users on the platform.

Three years later, they extended their sexualities to include an enormous variety of LGBQT+ identities. Gender is more complicated than you might realize. You can identify as transfeminine, pangender, transmasculine, genderqueer, trans,  and so much more.

The dating application OkCupid has amassed over 50 million users, and it's known as one of the most trusted and established dating apps. Not only do both trans and crossdressers use the platform, but you can find others who use both genders. It doesn't matter what your interests are, as long as you select a single hobby and focus on it exclusively.

Pros

Well established platform

Tons of gender options

Large user base

Cons

⇒ Click Here to Visit the Official Website of OkCupid

How To Be Safe On Trans Dating Sites?

Couples are digitally connecting at an alarming rate in today's fast-paced dating world. This is especially true in light of the coronavirus pandemic. Before the pandemic, 30% of all American adults said they had used online dating sites or apps.

This figure has risen to 52 percent among those who have never married, and it is also higher among adults who are currently living with their partner, reaching 46 percent. According to the Pew Research Center, 59 percent of people believe online dating is an excellent way to meet friends in 2015, whereas only 44 percent agreed in 2005.

Going online to find a date is risky, but it can be a fun and stress-free way to meet a potential match if done correctly. Here are some pointers for having a safe online dating experience.

1. Wait Until You Are Confident In Your Potential Match.

When online dating, you may come across personal information such as "I don't want a penpal" or "swipe left if you don't want to meet in person."

While meeting potential partners in person is ultimately necessary, don't feel obligated to meet someone until you are entirely comfortable. Don't be embarrassed or stressed if you have to wait longer; if they are genuinely the right person, they will give you the time you need to be completely satisfied with how things are going.

2. Conduct Some Preliminary Research On Your Potential Date.

While there is some social stigma associated with the potential "Facebook stalking" of a possible date, you should not feel bad about doing some social media research before meeting someone for the first time. There's nothing wrong with wanting to learn more about someone before going on a date with them. Social media is an excellent way to ensure that they are who they say they are and are not hiding anything. This is also a great way to spot red flags and avoid dealing with a fish.

3. Inform Your Friends And Family Of Your Plans And The Time You Expect To Return Home.

When making plans with someone you don't know on a dating app, make sure to notify a trusted friend or family member of your plans. You could even consider giving them access to your location via apps like iOS or "Find My Friends." When meeting for the first time, remember to be smart and use common sense. Don't go anywhere that wasn't planned, and if possible, avoid being alone with your date until you fully trust them.

4. Meet Only In Public Places.

When meeting someone for the first time, meet in a public place with a large number of other people. Restaurants, bars, cinemas, coffee shops, and even parks are excellent choices. It is not advised that you return to the apartment or house of someone you have just met. When meeting a date for the first time, it's best to plan ahead of time and stick to it. If something doesn't seem right, text a friend or make an excuse to leave the situation.

5. Use Only Your Own Mode Of Transportation.

Similarly, even if it is just a taxi or subway ride, it is best to provide your own transportation to the appointment. Explain to your date that you are only comfortable meeting on your own terms and driving yourself, especially for the first meeting. If they do not understand this condition, it is possible that the date should be rescheduled.

6. Make An Effort To Remain Sober.

On the first date, many people prefer to meet at a bar for drinks. While this may help to alleviate the stress of meeting a new person, it is critical that you maintain your wits at all times. The majority of date rapes take place in a bar, usually with alcohol involved. Avoid leaving your drink unattended and notify a bartender if you suspect anything suspicious has occurred.

7. Be Cautious Not To Divulge Any Of Your Personal Information.

Online dating scams are actual, and they are becoming more common. According to a USA Today report, bad actors have targeted people of all ages and demographics. Complaints about "romance scams" have increased in recent years. To avoid being a scam victim, do not reveal personal information before the possible date, and do not offer to send them money.

Remember that the person you're talking to online might not be who they claim to be. Never send money to people you've just met, and never give out personal information. Once that information is public, it is nearly impossible to keep it hidden.

8. If You Are Uneasy, Find A Way To Leave Right Away.

If you feel uneasy during the meeting or even before it begins, don't be afraid to cancel. You are never obligated to stay with someone if you feel embarrassed or threatened. When it comes to eHarmony or any other dating site, safety should always come first!

You are under no obligation to meet with this person, and you should never feel bad about canceling. Even if the other person is disappointed or does not understand, it is always better to be safe than sorry in this situation.

FAQs On Trans Dating Sites

Whether you are new to trans dating or a seasoned pro, there are some questions you may have about the process and some of these terms used. We have created this FAQ to help you enjoy and get the most out of your trans dating experience. 

Q. What Is A TS Female? 

A TS Girl is a transgender girl, also known as a trans woman.

So, a transgender girl (or transgender woman) is referred to as a TS Girl.

This indicates that the person was born with male genitalia and was assigned male at birth. However, they opted to transition and began identifying as a woman at a particular age.

They mainly had identified with this gender since childhood.

It's worth noting that not all transgender women undergo surgery to make them appear more feminine. Although some trans women identify as trans, they prefer to leave their penis and chest as they are.

Some transgender women, on the other hand, may opt for complete surgery to gain a vagina, breasts, and more feminine features in general.

Every transgender person has a unique story to tell!

Q. What Are Some Other Lgbtq+ Terms?

It's crucial to distinguish between phrases like "crossdresser," "drag queen," and "transgender."

Many transgender persons consider outmoded and inappropriate terms like "shemale dating," "tranny dating," and "transexual dating" to be used on transgender dating sites.

If you're unfamiliar with many of the trans-adjacent terminology you'll see on these dating services, these are the current definitions:

Crossdresser/Transvestite – A cisgender male who dresses up in women's clothing for the purpose of amusement and/or sexual enjoyment.

A drag queen is a man who dresses up as a woman for the purpose of entertainment.

A transgender woman is a person who was born male and has now transitioned to female.

A transgender man is a person who was born as a woman and then transitioned into a man.

Cisgender – A man or woman who identifies as the gender assigned to them at birth.

Shemale, Tranny, and Transexual are all terms for the same thing. For transgender persons, there are several outdated and sometimes derogatory phrases (usually trans women)

Binary/non-binary or Genderqueer/Genderfluid – A person who does not identify as male or female and may have characteristics of both sexes, switch between the two, or make no attempt to seem like a typical man or woman.

Keep in mind that different people have various interpretations of these phrases, and the terminology around the LGBTQ+ community is constantly changing and expanding. While these definitions are generally valid, some people may identify in unusual ways.

If you're unsure, politely and respectfully ask for an explanation!

Q. Are You Gay If You Date A Trans Person?

You are not gay if you date a transsexual person.

If you're a heterosexual male who likes women, it's only natural that you'd be interested in transgender women.

Because you're attracted to a WOMAN, this does not make you gay. She's merely transsexual.

If she has a penis and you enjoy it, you might be bisexual or simply drawn to transsexual persons on an aesthetic level.

When it comes to sexual orientation, most of us aren't 100 percent straight or homosexual. When someone has a transgender identification of some sort, it's not abnormal to be attracted to multiple characteristics of a transgender man or woman.

Q. Where Can I Meet Trans Women?

Many dating sites are set up for trans women and men and anyone else who isn't straight or cisgender (gender matching their birth sex).

Transexual Dates and TSdates are created with cisgender heterosexual men in mind. They are aimed at heterosexual men who want to meet transgender women.

While it is also possible to find matches on dating apps such as Transdr and Butterfly, other apps for the trans community, like Butterfly, focus more on serving them.

Q. Who Do Trans People Date?

Being transgender does not imply that a person must date anyone of any gender. They will date the type of person determined by their sexual orientation and what they are comfortable with.

Transgender singles, for example, may date cisgender and heterosexual men and women in some instances. Single transgender people can date other transgender persons. They are allowed to date gay members of the LGBTQ community, but they must be straight and cisgender.

It depends on the circumstances.

When in doubt, presume that a transsexual person does not engage in sexual activity. Transgender dating is far more diverse than you may think, and it includes people of all sexualities and gender identities looking for love.

Q. What Is The Best Transgender Dating Site?

But while there are certainly plenty of pros and cons to be found in the majority of these trans dating sites, in my opinion, TSDates and Butterfly would be the two best sites for trans daters.

With TS Dates, one might think of the word "chasery," but with Butterfly, people who identify as trans may be able to find a long-term partner.

You'll find that with each search, it becomes clear what you're searching for.

There are all kinds of dating services to suit every desire, and we're hoping this list will help you find the service that is right for you. It is important to always treat everyone with the compassion, respect, and affection they rightly deserve.

Q. Which Is The Best Transgender Dating Site For Serious Relationships?

Many trans individuals are looking for a long-term relationship to find a partner. A few of the dating sites focus on casual relationships, while others are more geared toward those looking for a more serious relationship. In those cases, we recommend any of the following:  Taimi, My Transsexual Date, or Butterfly. Each is designed to bring community members together through meaningful connections and connections that make for ideal matches.

Q. Which Online Dating Site Is Best For Casual Dating?

This is why apps for serious daters and platforms for trans persons wishing to date in a more casual context have been created. Trans persons can utilize an app similar to Tinder called Trans Date, which was created just for them.

TSDates, which launched in 2018, made a point of positioning itself as a "trans Tinder alternative." The trans dating app intends to promote more open-ended relationships with members of the LGBTQIA+ community to increase non-traditional relationships. TSDates is a wonderful place to start if you're searching for a casual approach to meeting people.

Conclusion – Which Is The Best Dating Site For Transgender?

For transgender individuals, the dating scene can be extremely tough to navigate. Starting online dating or going on dates, in general, might be frightening. Thankfully, many of these trans-friendly websites assist transgender people in crossing this bridge, shaping their identities, and beginning to explore the dating scene.

The above-mentioned transgender dating sites are a fantastic place to start. We will recommend TSDates.com, TSTVPersonals.com, and Butterfly as the top 3 best transgender dating sites. However, they are all nonjudgmental spaces that can assist trans singles in finding a loving companion—wishing you a successful and happy dating life!

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